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Sunday, October 11, 2009

prayer for forgiveness. (5&2)

oh god i replaced
the clean
to be more like you
and god
i displaced loose things
for love.
common people do
not stop
speaking, oh god i
never
ask why you seized my
fervor
and substituted
textile.
revised commitment
won’t soothe
growing fires i see
as just
static. ecstatic
to be
alive but greeting
some death.

when i turned five years
old, two
demons in the form
of sage
whispered eternal
cycles.
since then all i’ve done
is lie.

together that’s a seven.
sevens
multiply.

5 footnotes:

Anonymous said...

Alyssa said once, "You and Kelley write so much about it without every saying what It is."

Feeling disconnected from you.

Kelley said...

apologies - I've been a little too consumed by my own reality this week. Introversion phase-out starts tomorrow.

As for the poem, I wrote it after reading some from "The Gay Science" and watching "El ángel exterminador." The former: world in flux, errors, God is dead, eternal recurrence / The latter: empty symbolism, will, inside&outside.

Alternating lines of 5 and 2 syllables; this construction is meaningless, I just wanted some numbers that added up to seven and were far apart enough on the number line to invoke a certain contrast but avoid the challenge of one-syllabled words.

"Together that's a seven" breaks the pattern with 7 syllables.

"Sevens multiply" is a reference to Matt 18:22.

The 3 syllables of "multiply" to correspond to the three sevens in Matt 18:22; alternatively 777 is the number of Yahweh.

Matt 18:22 (KJV):
"Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven."

I'll write something cute next time, something sans the black-veiled literary allusions.

miss you girl.

Alyssa said...

1) Shallow comment first: I like youre new blog design. Probably because it reminds me of your elephant tattoo.

2) Since I'm not a poet laureate, my compliments don't mean much. However, after reading your explanation, I now know that you're a supremely talented poet. It's almost scary to read something with so many layers, because what lies at the center might not be an optimistic treasure. But nonetheless, the reader still reads because of the poet's compelling thought processes writ large.

In short, I like your stuff. You and Amy should probably start your own writers' colony.

Alyssa said...

And do you like how I said "youre" instead of "your"? You have a real smart friend back in Wheaton.

Kelley said...

To synthesize your points:

Tattoos, like poems, generate the most meaning after they're done. I am puzzled by people who won't get a tattoo on the basis of "I want it to have a special meaning;" similarly, I mistrust the writer who launches into creative discourse with a "meaningful" objective. Shit gets meaning injected into it all the time.

So, the rendering of my blog's design to match the aesthetic of my tattoo reflects my views about writing. See, I just made that up now. Meaning everywhere. You muse.